Q&A: Nxdia Captures the Rollercoaster of Romance and Demise on ‘Lovemesick’
INTERVIEW
INTERVIEW
☆ BY IVONA HOMICIANU ☆
Photo by @LOZFOLIO
LOVEMESICK IS AN IMPLOSION IN PROCESS—Through four songs, the project is an exploration of an intense, all-consuming relationship that filled Nxdia’s thoughts. Addictive and enthralling, Lovemesick portrays the rollercoaster of emotions that comes with giving it all to someone then realizing the relationship isn’t bringing you peace.
Born in Egypt to Egyptian-Sudanese parents and raised in Manchester, Nxdia’s cultural identity has been at the forefront of their creations. The artist combines English and Arabic to speak about their deepest introspective thoughts, vulnerability being an essential part of their songwriting despite the avoidant nature they convey. After gaining popularity with “She Likes A Boy,” they released their mixtape I Promise No One’s Watching last year, followed by a headline tour across Europe.
With Lovemesick, Nxdia keeps the high-energy of their previous releases while broadening the scope of their ingenuity. On the title track “Lovemesick,” they begin slowly with detail-oriented confessional songwriting. Their earnest interpretation takes a turn with the transition to the chorus, where the production goes darker as Nxdia’s vocals are distorted. Accompanied by drums and loud back vocals, they reveal they’ll either have an encompassing involvement or nothing.
“Balance Beam” unveils the pressures of being a perfect version of yourself—not rising to these expectations in a relationship makes for a recipe of self-destruction. The switch in tempo that was observed on the opening track is also noticed here, with the lyrics “I like going slow then going super fast” holding a double meaning in the context of the subject at hand. With sounds of a crash, Nxdia embodies the destruction that ensues in the narrative.
“Fuck Me Up” covers the subject of casual sex that Nxdia opened up on their previous single release “More!”. The confidence in the direction in which their career is going becomes apparent. Ending the project with “Anchor,” they consider how this relationship has impacted them. They recognise the end is imminent, but the difficulty of breaking up is just as present. Through a classic rock lens, they create an expansive atmosphere that brings us excitement over where they’ll go next.
Luna caught up with Nxdia to discuss their new EP, Lovemesick.
Photo by @LOZFOLIO
LUNA: You're now opening like a new chapter of your music career. What is the most important part of your career for you?
NXDIA: Honestly, the epicenter of everything for me has been community. You can see it when I'm seeing people before and after the shows, how I interact with people. It's just so special. That real life element of it is so special to me. The moments where everything goes into focus, and I'm just like, cool. It's tangible when I'm there with everyone and present with my community. I feel so awake in the best way. It’s a presence that I value so much.
LUNA: There’s these lyrics in “Lovemesick:” “A bleach stain on the carpet floor, a speed limit that you ignore.” Do you come up with these specific details on the spot, or is it something that you collect over time?
NXDIA: There's always a story around it, it's something that you can see if you look in the right place. I've got a really strange memory where I'll look at stuff and there'll be little pictures in my head. I'll see something, and I'll be like, “Oh, that's really cool.” Writing is such a visual process for me. I can see the room I was in when the thing I’m writing about happened. I can see tobacco on the window pane. I can see my older apartment. I can see the bleach stain. That's what everything looks like and I don't know how to make that sound less like I'm a creepy person who pays too much attention to things! I blame journaling. My mom gave me my first journal when I was four, and I've just been obsessively detailing.
LUNA: Where do you find inspiration outside of music?
NXDIA: Art. I love museums. I love going on walks with my friends and us not knowing where we're going. I love painting. I like ruining perfectly good clothes trying to make something pretty. Anything in movement, drawing or writing, or sometimes just literally touching grass. I think it's important to get out there and see things.
LUNA: “Lovemesick” starts slow and then picks up for the chorus and goes back to slow at the end, which is something that is often the case in your music. You even say it in “Balance Beam:” “I like going slow then going super fast.” What does this specific change in tempo signify for you?
NXDIA: I get so bored of music when I’m just passively listening. I love a lot of new music and its really inspiring when I see people being more daring and fun, changing it up more. The new wave of artists I'm seeing, Tiffany Day, Fcukers, Underscores, Slayyyter, they're killing it with unexpected pop. I grew up on hyperpop, whether it was Dorian Electra or Charli xcx back in the day. There were a lot of really cool electronic artists I was interested in. In my head, it's popping candy music. It's music that hits your brain. You can feel it everywhere, and it's an experience. You wish you existed in that song, just so that you could dance to it fully, the volume can't be high enough.
LUNA: Could you talk about “Balance Beam” and what you intended to express with it?
NXDIA: All of the songs on the EP are about different stages of a relationship. With “Balance Beam,” I wanted to express how sometimes it can go either way. I can be in something destructive and possessive and either fall off but know that was the right thing to do, or be like: “Fuck, I just destroyed everything.” It's very self destructive. It's very self indulgent and it's about embracing that feeling.
LUNA: I love the lyric, “I think being my best self is ruining my self esteem.”
NXDIA: I can't watch another looksmaxxing video, sorry. I can't think about how to heal my inner child. I can't think about whether a tarot reader told me that I’m going to be super rich and super happy. I don't want to hear it, so I'm just gonna go out and have fun. I think that self improvement is so shoved down our throats in a way that makes no sense, and also it's often in a way that's so vapid. Who cares? Can we teach people how to fly please? How can I breathe in the water for two days? Teach me that.
LUNA: “Anchor” feels very different from other songs in the sense that it feels a lot more like classic rock. Do you think you'll dabble in other genres, either adjacent to rock or completely different, in your future projects?
NXDIA: Definitely. With “Anchor,” it was looking at that point before a relationship where we both know it's definitely gonna end. Everyone's too chicken to say something and it's because you care so much and you don't want it to end on this note. We’re both fighting the feeling that we’re feeling. Writing it was super fun. The ending of that song is super R&B randomly. I think with this next wave of writing music, I know what I'm going to explore. There's going to be a lot more world building. I'm not going to spill everything, but I'm going to be playing around a lot. I'm really excited. I think it's going to be really fun.
LUNA: This is the first project after I Promise No One's Watching, and it already feels very different. How is this era different from that one?
NXDIA: I went through a breakup, so probably that! Last year was incredible, and it was so formative in so many really exciting ways. But I also didn't have time until the end of the year. I had my headline tour in October and it was super exciting, but I came to the crux of the year at the end of it. Then I'd gone through a breakup and I was in the hospital. I was thinking, “What the hell is going on?”. I was going to parties and I was running around aimlessly, it was really sad, and then it was really fun. Then it was really boring, and then it was really cool. I just felt this completely nauseating dizziness, in terms of how much my mind would change about how I felt. It ended up pouring itself into this EP, which is why it sounds the way it does.
LUNA: In a previous interview with the Luna Collective, you said: “I'm intertwining my identity much more with the music, digging deeper and letting more people into my world.” Do you feel you've achieved that with this project? And if so how would you describe this growth?
NXDIA: I've definitely done it more. I'm so nervous that’s someone gonna text me like, “What the fuck?” but sorry, it's the truth. I definitely feel like I'm being more honest. I've been journaling every day. I always journalled often but I wouldn't journal every day until this year. I've been doing a lot more of that and it's been really healing. I've been getting more in touch with who I am. But I still want to build that world out even more!
LUNA: Are there any other plans in store for new music or new concerts, other career things?
NXDIA: It’s busy. The music video for “Lovemesick” is dropping soon and I’m playing three intimate shows, Bristol, London and Manny. Then after that, it's mostly going to be festivals. For the most part, I'm going to get my head into gear. I know what I'm doing next and I'm really excited.
